FCC descends

OK, it's a little too popular on the outraged leftist fringe of social comment to make the observation, but I'll do it anyway. The FCC, M. Powell et. al. (for the most part), soundly rejected 36 complaints made by the Parents Television Council, in what appears to be a series of letters from Lara Mahaney, Director of Corporate and Entertainment Affairs, PTC. Yes, my fellow Americans, the testicles of the FCC have descended.

The general mise en scene of the PTC's complaints revolve around, with a few exceptions, one theme. The human body is dirty. A great number of the complaints (which can be read in detail in PDF and Word format, posted on the FCC's website: documents FCC 04-279 and FCC 04-280) revolve around the use of the word dick. Not in the 'my that's a big dick hanging between you legs' sense, but more of the Jon Stewart extolling the essence of Tucker Carlson sense. The FCC found that in most cases, where "dick" reared its ugly purple head, it was only meant to criticize or denigrate the object of the phrase, and not describe a sexual or excretory organ. So we now know, as a matter of decency, we can make someone feel bad, we just cannot refer to their anatomy.

For example: on a broadcast program (this includes any station that is available to you via rabbit ears) the phrase, "Chad, stop swinging your dick" is indecent; the phrase, "Chad, nobody likes you and we're all planning to kill you in painful and embarrassing ways because you are a dick" is acceptable. And while the human body, alone and in its parts, is dirty, it is far dirtier if that said body is referred to in congress with another filthy body. Dirtier still is any reference to congress or affection between two disgusting bodies of the same sex.

Where I get confused is on following point. The same few shows were cited over and over for alleged indecency: Friends, Scrubs, various WB properties; I have a recommendation to the PTC: change the channel. Turn your TV off. There are a lot of dicks out there who are going to offend you, and most of them work as television writers.

Award for funniest citation of indecency was the complaint lodged against the Simpsons episode that dealt with education cuts. Lisa, rabble rouser that she is, organizes a student strike to protest the elimination of arts and music from school. One of the protest signs read, "What would Jesus Glue," another, "Don't cut off my pianissimo." What? Satire is now indecent? Making fun of self-righteousness is now unacceptable? The fact that musical directions have a humorous phonic resemblance to "penis" is out of bounds? If people want to be taken seriously when they crow about declining standards of decency (and they may have a point) they can't raise the call to arms every time someone disagrees with them or makes fun of them. The "What Would Jesus Do?" phenomenon is open game. If you want to wear those ridiculous bracelets (made by slave labor in some Far Eastern sweatshop, by the way) while railing against homos and shilling for tax cuts, you have to expect that people are going to make light of the phrase. Get a thicker skin PTC. If your mission is to create a nation of people that concur, you're going to have a long and thankless battle. People are laughing at you. You have become ridiculous.

Not one complaint dealt with violence. One of my favorite junk-food shows is "24" but I would never in a million years recommend that anyone allow their children to watch it. In my view, its not a good show unless at least five people violently die, something blows up and the constitution is violated on at least three levels. This is great television, but terrible civics. Is it indecent? Apparently not. They don't say dick. They show a federal officer shooting a prisoner in the chest and cutting off his head, but they don't make any reference to sex or excretory organs.